Chewbacca, What a Wookie!

(No, I don’t know how long I’ll be able to keep up with the song names as post titles. My Magic 8-ball says “Forever”, but then again, you never know…)

The other day, I got an e-mail from my mother asking me what I was planning to do for the Episode III premiere. Which is on May 19th. May 19th also happens to be in 2 weeks. 2 weeks is, in my hometown, known as “Not a lot of time to go”, especially for a groundbreaking event like this. Because I, as you may know, am a proud waiter-in-line (As in, I have my pride. Unlike these guys). So, my mom’s e-mail actually caught me off-guard. You see, I pictured May 19th, and the Episode III premiere, as still being a-ways off, which probably says a lot more about my life now that I’ve moved than me not caring about this kind of stuff anymore. Because I can still remember a couple of months ago watching the trailer and going “Wow, May 19th… Do I have to wait that long?”. The answer, ghost of alvarete past, is “No, you’ll actually be blogging about it in about 2 months time. Oh, by the way, April 24th, don’t eat that pudding. It’s spoiled”.

So, back to the matter at hand, premieres here don’t work like they should. You see, Spain’s inhabitants, being all educated and european, don’t like going into a movie theater and fighting over the best seats. We have numbered seating, except on crappy movies like “Smoke: the secret life of cuban lesbian albino tobacco leaf harvesters”. Which, of course, takes away all the fun in line-standing. It’s no longer “SUCKERS! WATCH ME TAKE CENTER SEAT, CENTER ROW!”, but “Gee, I wonder how quickly I can call the toll-free line and reserve my seats”. Sure, I could’ve tried and stood in line outside a phone cabin the night before the tickets went on pre-sale, but it’s not the same. Oh, this is for the 19h00 showing, on THURSDAY!

“Dude, no Wednesday midnight showing? What the FUCK, man?”

Precisely. You see, being civil and european also involves caring about how people go home. So all public shows are timed to end before 01h30, which is the time when the subway stops making its rounds. I’ve asked around, but there’s no (to my knowledge) intention of showing it at midnight on wednesday anywhere. So, my plans for the premiere:

  • Buy tickets online or through the toll-free number (Check)
  • Show up 30 minutes before the movie starts (Pending)
  • ???????????
  • PROFIT! (Also pending)

So, there’s no pre-movie excitement. No time to hang out with the peeps outside the theater and poke fun at the Jedi-clad losers. Just… A movie. Mr. Lucas, this time, more than ever, you have to make it up to me.

I want to believe…

Trackbacks & Pings

  1. Prozac. on 15 Nov 2008 at 3:38 pm

    Prozac….

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Comments

  1. nashira wrote:

    “Mr. Lucas, this time, more than ever, you have to make it up to me.”

    My feelings, since Episode I.

    I shouldn’t have said that? Too much SW fans? Star Trek sucks? Yeah yeah yeah… Whatever.

    Live long.

  2. alvarete wrote:

    Oh yeah, the last two Star Trek movies were awesome! Totally worth the price of admission! And the TV series! Voyager! My oh my, the very definition of greatness…

  3. nashira wrote:

    Jar Jar Binks.

    After that, you can say what you want, honey, I’ll be glad to listen.

  4. Deadpool wrote:

    So, I got some leads about the location of this strange place where weird people share their thoughts about geeky, nerdy stuff…and I was like, I’m there bitch!, count me in!
    Skinny bitch, how could you not let me know that you had this shit up and running? you’ll pay! IT’S ON! (from one of Southpark’s finest episodes “You got fucked in the ass”).
    As for the current post, I’m not a big Star Wars fan, LOTR is more my cup of tea. However, I’ve watched all the movies (not the retooled ones though, too hardcore for me), Cartoon Network’s Clone Wars (this show rules to fucking hell!) and the trailers for the upcoming movie; also I’ve just finished some PC Games (Republic Commando and Lego Star Wars) that have some spoilers…and I gotta admit I think Mr. Lucas will make us very happy with this one.
    Nashira, ep I was BAD but not terrible (must…forget…Jar…Jar), ep II was GOOD and I think this one has the chance to be the best ever, so we must hope that they don’t blow it. BTW, Star Trek sucks so much I’m not even gonna discuss it.

  5. nashira wrote:

    Star Trek will always suck for Star War fans. That says a lot about fans, I guess.

  6. nashira wrote:

    Welcome, Deadpool! Now we need charlesg31 and we’re all set, he’ll start calling me “Marla” and crying everytime we refer to George Michael as a “pansie”.

  7. Deadpool wrote:

    Fear not Nashira, Chalito already knows about this shit…I also think “The Artist Formerly Known As La Barba” may show up soon

  8. Johann wrote:

    Well , i will be in the 2 hour line, waiting in anticipation. Will run with the angry mob, elbow the guy behind, pull that lady with the kids by the hair, just to sit down and say: ” See fuckers, i got center seats”. I can´t wait just to do that, we will miss ya in the line. We have asembled a good collection of geeks for Episode 3, It will be a line filled with Magic the Gathering games, anime and coments like: ” Man did you see that guy, he looks just like Kai Budde.” That said we will keep a place for you at the theater, accually it´s also a way to laugh at the silly guy who enters one min before the movie starts, looks at the space in the middle of the theater and decides that all the people in the theater decided to leave that center spot open, waiting his arrival. Anyway seeya around Alvarete

  9. Deadpool wrote:

    Johann, I don’t know you, but you better be fast, you better be smart and you better be ruthless cause I’m going for that center seats too! Just so you know, I’m going with my gang too so maybe we could have a “Beat it” (Michael Jackson) scene (but geek style, how would that fare? comments please!)

  10. Salomon wrote:

    Hey everyone. just glad to say that thanks to Deadpool i have my 2 tickets for the midnight shiow of ep3.
    Happy to know you’re back on the net sugesting your thoghts on all of us.
    A very emotional hello from the distance for you(alvarete and nashira).
    “adventure…heh… excitement… a jedi craves not this things” …………..but I sure do

  11. Chase Ransom wrote:

    Originally I was going to submerse into a extensive essay on why Star Wars is the best thing to hit movie screens in history, despite many nay-sayers. LOTR, as if. Star Trek; what?

    Dont get me wrong I love LOTR and I grew up with the books, but you cant compare Star Wars to LOTR, and if you cant see why, then “enough of the subject you know not”.

    Prediction: Episode III will be the best of the 3 prequels. I have gone back and looked at the Episodes IV thru VI and I must say, the prequels are just as good, if not maybe even a little better. Only dif is that we arent all 7 years old and shit.

    Now leave me alone while I play the Star Wars version of Risk.

    F’ers.

  12. Mozalbete wrote:

    Oh my God…

    What the F?

    Geek Convention Galore

    I goddamn love SW.. I like a lil’ bit LOTR.. but its not anywhere near as pure and wholesome as SW.

    Star F’n Trek?

    F _\\//… F it all the way.

    My advice to you, muh peeps…

    Get laid… lotsa lotsa…

    Gregotiro.. Friend of Jar Jar

  13. nashira wrote:

    Salomon and Deadpool, I miss you… I hope every time you get your burgers (or steaks) at the mall you also get nauseous and sad, as in “pathetique”, thinking how the hell you’ll go on without me, if you please.

    As for Chase Ransom’s prediction, I totally agree. Ep. 3 will be the best, how can it get any worser than Jar Jar? ;) I know, I suck at this. Then again…

    Mozalbete, watch it, sweety.

  14. Mozalbete wrote:

    :(

  15. Blind Willie wrote:

    If you put a gun in both Data and Jar Jar Binks head, I’ll be pleased to see Jar Jar’s brain spill all over the place, but I’ll pee myself in amusement to see this fucking robot whining like a bitch in excrutiating pain* and dying like a dog. Come to think about it, I think I might segregate some other fluid too..

    (*) This is Sci Fi, I’m sure there is a way.

    How come MTV hasn’t paired this two at Celebrity Match Up yet?

  16. nashira wrote:

    ’cause MTV sucks even more than Jar Jar and Data together

  17. Blind Willie wrote:

    Word!

  18. Schiz Cum Snake wrote:

    Jar Jar didn’t piss me off so much in Episode I; I liked that movie A LOT, by the way (Ian McDiarmid fucking rules). My major pet peeve in that movie was that little Anakin was played by a nine year old brat. I don’t care if this is a fantasy movie, I just have a hard time believing that a small dipshit, who is quite probably unable to wipe his own ass properly, can fly pod racers and be an expert mechanic. Way too unrealistic.

    Despite his short appearance, Jar Jar did manage to get under my skin in Episode II, not only because he didn’t grow any older (as opposed to me), but because he was put in a position of political power.

    And F _\\//

    :-)

  19. nashira wrote:

    Like I said, Schiz, Star Trek will always suck for the romantic space novelette fans.

  20. alvarete wrote:

    “but because he was put in a position of political power.”

    Lucas is a genius, he predicted George W. getting re-elected…

    “Ah, but he’s so dumb! Just like me and you, Daisy Jo. Now, lube me up a pig, we’re having a threesome!”

  21. alvarete wrote:

    I also get the feeling that this one won’t suck. It’s what I always say, because I don’t want them to suck, but hey, such is life. I’ve avoided all spoilers this time, and been pleasantly surprised by the trailers (as in, “cool, it’s out, let’s watch that shit”, instead of “OMG! IT COMES OUT NEXT WEEK! OMG OMG OMG!!!!11oneeleventyone”

    Getting old sucks. What’s the feeling on everybody re-visiting the Star Wars universe for what could be the last time? (Not counting the new 3d remasters already in the works, which should come with new scenes, or the 2 tv series, or the Clone Wars cartoons, plus the eventual Special Editions of Episodes I, II and III.. No news yet on any life for Lucas outside of Star Wars.)

  22. Chase Ransom wrote:

    I dont feel dated by the last Episode and more than some sort of sorrow for it being the end, I am glad to see the complete story finally (after like 20-sum years).

    It’s all about Vader baby. Who loves you? You’re beautiful.

    F it.

  23. Blind Willie wrote:

    You really think this is over? Wanna bet? My guess is in a couple of years we’ll have a remake of the original Star Wars Saga (Episode IV and so on).

  24. dorothy hale wrote:

    My situation is more pathetic…I have to watch it in spanish, so my six year old who is the biggest fan, understands the movie…

  25. Schiz Cum Snake wrote:

    I’ve heard the movie is not suitable for six year olds. It’s PG 13.

  26. dorothy hale wrote:

    You’re right, I was thinking about that this morning…But he has seen all of them…and Lord of the Rings, i don’t think it can get bloodier than that.

    We’ll see what to do…

  27. Deadpool wrote:

    Mr. Lucas has gotten me into deep shit for this one, my 5 year old, “el enano” as Alvarete and Nashira sure remember is definitely gonna cut me in half with his lightsaber if I don’t take him to see the movie…I guess I’ll have to dress him like Yoda or something…

  28. nashira wrote:

    “El enano” rules to hell, he’s the coolest little geek I’ve ever met. Remember the photo session at the mall? HAHAHAHAHAHA He’s so cute! (fill this space _________ with the obvious “unlike you” sentence)

  29. LoBo204 wrote:

    Chu**… alvarete.. y ahora quien ira al cine a hacer cola desde las 6pm???…
    Se le extraña …

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